For the last couple of days, I’ve had an intense desire to return to a restaurant where I haven’t eaten in years.
Cosmo’s Pizza was one of my two favorite pizza places in Birmingham for many years. (Salvatore’s is the other.) A political client first took me there in the early 1990s and it quickly became a place that I would visit over and over — with many different people.
It was in the heart of Birmingham’s artsy Five Points South area. It was eclectic. The crowd could be strange. There was energy and weirdness in the air. I loved it.
Cosmo’s closed permanently in 2016, so it’s been a decade. But over the weekend, I found myself intensely craving the experience of being there.
I was craving the pizza, but I was craving the atmosphere even more. And after thinking about it for a couple of days, I’ve realized I was craving something else. I was craving some of the experiences I’ve had there — and it finally hit me that I was craving something about the people I’ve taken there, too.
This felt like more than simple nostalgia, though. I had the odd feeling that something in me felt like returning to the past to finish some unfinished emotional business. Every woman I dated for years went to Cosmo’s at least once — and some went there many times with me.
As I tried to get to sleep in the wee hours of Sunday night, I puzzled over what I was feeling. And it suddenly hit me that there was something I needed to say — to women I’ll never even talk with again.

My life will matter only if I can show love and meaning to others
Why did I really feel annoyed? They were happy; I was jealous
Part of me loves you dearly, but warring parts are hostile or afraid
Want to really understand someone? Visit the places that shaped his past
I’m waiting for life to begin, but I’m feeling lost and alone tonight
Check out my re-runs if you’d like, because I’m on vacation for a bit
Confessing my ego’s old desires reveals hidden fears of my past